27 March 2012

How can I make it come out?

So I have been pretty quiet about our 'failure' with potty-training. Yes, I know, it's not a failure, just not an accomplishment, yet. It's also just totally frustrating.

So after my post back in December (click here to reread it), I just gave up. Or let's say, I just stopped pushing the issue. We kept encouraging her when the potty talk came up, but I stopped trying to persuade her, every chance I got. It's was not worth it and I just didn't want to pressure her too much. I felt I might delay her wanting to try even further.

Surprisingly, last week though, she wanted to wear undies. She has wanted to do this before, and every time she tried them on, she would use them as a diaper - meaning, she would just wet it or do worse..... So I told her that if she wanted to use her cool Dora and princess underwear, she needed to use the potty! She agreed to do so. And guess what? She did. For the entire week. She went potty at home, in the store and at our friend's houses. Number One that is!

I was very happy about this. For number Two, she would ask her a diaper, and for now, I let her. That is until this weekend. She stopped going to the bathroom again, and requested a diaper all day long. Seriously? This back and forth is new to me and soooooo frustrating!

I am not sure why, but I think, she had kept most her number twos inside of her and now the urge was just too great to bare. She has been trying to go to the bathroom for the past three days! She is traumatized - I am just not sure why or how it happened because I never 'forced' her to do it on the potty, I only tried to encourage her (greatly). Maybe that was wrong.

Nonetheless, I am impressed, and scared, by how good she is at just keeping the poops inside of her. She squeezes her butt cheeks together so hard that, seriously, not much comes out. When something does come out, it is soft - something that tells me that it's not too hard to come out! It's a struggle of will power and body power - and so far, it looks like that her will is winning. It doesn't matter if it is potty or diaper, she is just not wanting to go! How can I make her go?

I don't know what to do anymore. I can't reach in inside of her and pull it out (Please, do NOT try to picture this one!). I have been giving her laxative in her drink once a day, almost every day, and it still doesn't do the trick.... or at least it does, in keeping the poop soft enough to not hurt her when it does come out.

Does anybody out there have any advise? Any suggestions? How can I make it come out?

This has been such a struggle. It's painful to watch her when she squeals in agony, trying to keep it in. It's painful to know that the more she tries to not go, that at some point, she will have to go..... It's painful because this shouldn't be an issue. Coqui was so easy and so wonderfully compliant - every trick worked on him. Peanut just doesn't want to! We can't bribe her, because she just doesn't care enough about anything that you could bribe her with. Talking her into it doesn't work either. Games don't work. Reasoning doesn't work on her. I am out of ideas. And seriously, I am also sick of having to find ways to make her go, instead of just simply teaching her to do it! Argh.


C. Beth said...

You know I understand this!!! And unfortunately, NONE of the tricks worked for me. Only waiting. Only time. And in time, she did get it. But I would get so frustrated with all the "tricks" people gave me since NONE of them worked. So I won't give you any "tricks"! I'll just tell you I was most at peace when I relaxed some and let her take the the lead...going in a diaper if that's what' it required. Eventually she got it. But she was over 4 by the time she got over the fear. I could never understand her fear--she had soft poops too! But she was afraid, for whatever reason, and way too good at holding it in. Now she's a champion pooper. It does change eventually; unfortunately, with certain temperaments--the child's preferred timing is very different than the mom's preferred timing!

Leslie said...

I am constantly reminded that our girls are pretty much the exact same age. We are dealing with the same thing over here. So no advice, but just letting you know that I feel your pain.