New hobby for an awesome boy

Okay, here is the thing, I am not into sports, at all. I never liked watching it on TV, not in Europe, and I certainly didn't start over here in the US. It's a personal choice and I know that I am very alone with that choice. I am okay with that.

So when the Hubby mentioned that he wanted to sign Coqui up for some soccer - I was not so sure what to think of it. I mean, do I mind that he runs around a field for a little while to get some energy out? No, absolutely not. He loves it and always has, and has been asking for this for a long time. So how could I stand in the way of that? I couldn't..... so we signed him up.

The hubby went to the first practice with him (and Peanut in tow). Oh man, Coqui was soooo excited! It was nice that Daddy got to go because it was one of those rare Firsts for him - he doesn't get many of those! (I am sure some of you Daddies can relate.) Peanut loved kicking her own ball around with Daddy, while Coqui was out on the field.

But the second time, it was just me and the kids, and really.... I didn't like it. I could care less how well he does. To me, it's a sport where he gets to move his muscles. That's all. I am not a soccer mom who stands on the sidelines and cheers them all on. I mean after all, these kids are just 5 years old. What IS important to me is that he is doing something he really likes (and is naturally very good at it), that he has fun, and is maybe learning one or two social skills along the way......


So when Coqui had his first game on Saturday, he was ecstatic. He had been looking forward to this. Especially because he was finally allowed to wear his uniform. Here is a picture from before the game. Team shirt, shorts, red soccer socks, cleats, and shinguards. He was more than ready.

So Daddy took him to the game. Just the two men! It was too early in the morning for Peanut to be even up yet. So I gladly stayed home to watch her sleep.... hahaha.

Apparently, Coqui did awesome. He alone shot 7 (seven) goals. And according to him, his team won, of course. [At this age, they don't keep score, and they also have no goalie, so shooting a goal is (if you ask me) pretty easy!] He had a blast and rejoiced all day.

Here is his team picture.

First signs of Nesting

There are so many things going on right now, that it is hard at times to remember that we are pregnant and that there is a baby on the way. I mean, it's only about four more months and then we'll have a little one amidst us.....

I NEED TO GET READY.

So while I was a little less social for a few days, I started to clean the house. It needed general cleaning anyways. But while I was at it, I started moving other items as well. I started to de-clutter and just throw things out that I didn't think we needed any more. Then I caught myself moving furniture and clothes and toys and.... yes, I was busy for an entire day! I guess I used a sick day (from the kids) to be really productive.

Well, the biggest move was actually to get Peanut out of her crib - you know, in a few months, the new baby will need a place to sleep! We had talked to her about being a big girl and asked her if she was ready to move out of her crib - she was not. Coqui was so easy. We asked if he wanted a big boy bed and we were greeted with a big yes. We went out and bought it, built it, and he slept in there ever since..... easy-peasy....
Not our Missy. She can be such a piece of work. Reasoning doesn't work with her, so we just had to wait. Wait for her to be more ready. And no, we never told her the reason why she needs to move out of that bed. We don't want her to feel pushed out because of the baby. That would create resentment, and we really just want to welcome the baby with open arms into the family.

So Sunday night, the Hubby was finally fed up with her binkie-addiction. Yes! I admit it, she was still having a pacifier in her bed. She was not allowed to have it outside the bed, but inside, at night, yes, she still used one. Yes, ONE in particular. It got so bad that she ONLY wanted that one, no other. So I had to get up a few times at night to find THAT specific binkie for her. How tiring!
So the Hubby told her, she is a big girl now, she doesn't need any more binkies. And if she sleeps one night without the binkie, she'll get her princess bedding - something she had talked about wanting for a long time. So we made a deal - no more binkie and she would get that bed next day.

It was not the worst night, but it was also not a good night. I think I ended up sleeping with her int he guest room.... But we let it go and next day, we went out and bought those beddings. Coqui got Star Wars and Peanut got Princesses. I had to wash all afternoon to get them ready for the night..... And at bedtime, we put the kids in ONE room for the first time, Peanut in the toddler bed, and Coqui on the floor for right now - he is waiting for his big (big) boy bed to be ready.....

And wouldn't you know, being in one room with her brother was so much more exciting than missing her binkie! She went to sleep like a big girl.
It didn't last all night long, but she did good. The second night was the best so far - both kids slept through the entire night until about 7 am in the morning. Yeah! Last night was pretty much a disaster, hence she ended up back in her crib. Tonight, I am very much looking forward to a quiet night.

Overall, I am so happy that we did all these changes in one shot. It seems that she is doing really well with it. I love that at bedtime, I only have to sing one time, not twice in each room. I am still reading four stories, two for her and two for him, but that is okay! My kids don't sit still during the day to read books, so I am glad that this is part of our night time routine.

Now I have to go into the baby's room, get all of Peanut's stuff out, and the baby stuff ready..... oh so much to do and so little time! I am really excited and I really need this nesting to make the eventual bonding easier and smoother. I am looking forward to have this Little One with us, but I am also nervous. For the next few months, I am really going to try to wrap my mind around the oncoming miracle.

So any suggestions on how to do that without my hormones changing or being all out of whack?

Happy Valentine's Day

Well, I believe that Valentine's Day is NOT just for couples, I actually believe that this day is about any love: the love for our parents, our children, our friends. But most of all, it is about the love for our God. So I just wanted to share a few scriptures with you that are so encouraging, no matter where you are in your life, believer or non-believer, baby Christian or the Rock in the storm. We are all God's children and He loves us ALL equally, unconditionally, and with such a passion that just blows you away when you realize it....

"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." (1 Corinthians 13:13)
(because God IS love.)

"Know therefore that the Lord your God is God; He is the faithful God, keeping His covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love Him and keep His commands." (Deuteronomy 7:9)

"And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8:38-39) 

"The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness." (Jeremiah 31:3)

"Your love, O Lord, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies. Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains, your justice like the great deep. O Lord, you preserve both man and beast. How priceless is your unfailing love! Both high and low among men find refuge in the shadow of your wings."  (Psalms 36:5-7)

"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." (John 15:13)

"There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love." (1 John 4:18) 

"And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose for them." Romans 8:28)

I hope that you find someone, today, to share some love and kindness with. Also, I hope that you will receive some love from someone else. Kindness can go a long way - I know that from personal experience. Lately, I have been blessed by showers of love, mercy, grace, kindness, forgiveness, and acceptance. It feels so great!

The balance of common sense

"Be well balanced, be vigilant and cautious at all times; for that enemy of yours, the devil, roams around like a lion, seeking someone to seize upon and devour." (1 Peter 5:8)

Don't you hate that when you feel like a fool, again and again?

Well, I feel like this today after reading this in the book "Me and My Big Mouth" by Joyce Meyer. We are reading it for our book club, organized through our church. I am late in reading this - we were suppose to be done with the first three chapters, like.... last month. Oh well, things happen and it's not like I have nothing to do in my life right now..... but I also think, that I was suppose to read that verse this morning. After a day of doubting God, and everything around me, my entire life. The devil for sure got a hay day with me yesterday, and I feel like a fool today....

Right after this verse, the book states that "extremes are actually the devil's playground". Wow. Really? So dealing with bi-polar - I am an easy target!? That really is irritating and exhausting! Not only for me, but to the people around me as well, who have to 'deal with me'. I don't want that for my life. I want to be done with it. There are so many things right now that I just feel I want to be done with! Seriously. I want it to be over and never to come back. I am tired of those things haunting me, and it is destroying my relationships with God, and family and friends. I NEED HEALING. I need God to heal and take away this pain.

But there is hope. In 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, the Love Verse. You all know it.
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." 

I received that gift yesterday through two amazing friends, women of God and sisters that just loved me and encouraged me, that prayed for me and that met me where I was. They showed me that unconditional love. I am God's child and He loves me. He wants me to be here where I am right now, even when I don't want to be here and it IS so hard. But I know that I want to be a light for others, I want to show off my scars one day and say, only through God and my friends, I have come this far..... Glory to God for putting those special people in my path, for sending them to walk alongside me, for carrying me and for cheering me on! Thank you.

My First Half-Marathon

As I am sitting here, trying to wrap my thoughts around the fact that I just finished my first half-marathon this morning, I have to admit that I am pretty whiped out. But I am definitely happy that I did it and it was for a good 'cause'. But let me start with the reason why I did this massive race today.

When we started talking about Beth carrying our baby last year, she had issues with her legs that afflicted her running. She had to stop and that was hard for her. Now, today, I DO believe that it was God trying to get her ready for a pregnancy where her focus would be more on growing a baby inside of her, and less on her running. I also believe that once the baby is done 'baking' and ready to enter the world, God will give her full healing, so she can go back to what she liked doing: running. So last year in January, she ran this half-marathon..... this year she is not able to do so.

So I made a 'deal' with her: on the day of our pregnancy test, I would sign up for that race, and either we run it together (in case of a negative test), or I would run it for her! Yep.... I thought of it as my (little) sacrifice of my body for what she is doing with her body right now..... We got a positive pregnancy test, so I had to run it by myself, for her. It's a great cause!

I knew I wanted two things to happen on race day: run the entire time, no matter how slow, and make it to the finish line. I did both!
So I ran the entire 13.1 miles from start to finish! No water breaks, no bath room breaks, no walking. I ran slow, NO, really slow! But I made it. I made it to the finish line at a decent time. Also, I like to convert it to kilometers, just because it sounds like so much more; so 13.1 miles are 21.08 kms - awesome! I am pretty proud of myself for accomplishing that today.

Now I said I ran it for her, right? So in advance, I made a sign that I was going to wear on my back on race day. I am sure you all know, when you do cancer runs and walks, there are always lots of pictures 'in honor of' or 'in memory of' someone. Well, I ran for a live person, I ran for my best friend because she couldn't do it because she is busy 'baking' a little blessing. Here is my sign:

I got lots of encouraging words throughout the run, words that blessed me and reminded me of why I was running and that I needed to keep going. "That is so awesome." or "That's cool." or "Congratulations." were most of  the reactions. One lady said that she "really liked my best friend" - well, I agree. Later in the race, I saw her again and she said: "That baby is going to be so proud of you." Well, I hope so. When I met Beth at the finish line, I told her about her and sure enough, we saw that lady again and I was able to introduce her to Beth. It was beautiful.

I had seen the route before, I knew that it was mostly downhill, and I knew that I could make it. What I didn't realize was that we ran along a lot of "icons" that play a big role in my life, and foremost that play a huge role in this entire process. The first building was our fertility center. When I saw that I started to choke up.... it took my breathe away and I realized that being 6 miles into the race, there was no room for crying. I had to stop and concentrate on NOT crying but running, or I would have fainted. Right next to that building is my oncology and I was silently thanking God for the people working inside that building. A little later, we ran past my favorite Vegan restaurant - for those that don't know, I became a Vegan after the cancer. Then we ran past the Hubby's university building and the local football stadium. It was a bit emotional at times. The best part was coming up the last hill and turning the corner to sprint to the finish line. Where Beth was waiting for me. It blessed me greatly that she agreed to come see me finish the race. Thank you.

Usually, when I run, I need some upbeat music, but I knew, for this particular race, I needed God right with me, so I played worship and praise music and it was a great comfort. Knowing that God designed my body to do this and knowing that He wanted me to run and finish this race today gave me strength and endurance. Beth had texted me the same bible verse that I saw on a sign that somebody was holding up on the sidelines during the race: Philippians 4:13 "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." How true!

It was perfect timing, too.  We are 18 weeks pregnant today.

Also, I saw this race today as my "Labor and Delivery", a small token of my appreciation of what Beth will do in about 5+ months. I come a long way from being able to finish a 5K to this now! Also, or especially, as a cancer survivor! So, I consider the first ten miles as my 'labor'. I was barely aware of running the first five miles at all. It was easy to keep my pace and enjoyed the attention I got with my sign. Then it got just a tidbit harder, but I still enjoyed running. I had thought that the hardest mile would be Mile Nine, because it said that there was some uphill, but it wasn't. The hardest mile was ten - as it had been before in my practice run. I would call that mile my 'transition'. I started hurting just a bit, mostly on my left hip. Mile eleven and twelve were a piece of cake, seriously. We were really going downhill and I just ran as fast as I could, knowing I still had a bit to go. Miles 13 was my 'pushing', because it was really hard to get to the finish line. It went uphill again and I was just so tired, and hurt enough to want to stop running. Then there was a big uphill right before the finish line, I barely made it up. The thought of Beth waiting for me and God wanting me to finish this kept me going.... and I made it up really, really slowly! Turning that corner for the last 0.2 miles was like seeing the end of the tunnel. Baby's head is out, the rest of the body is 'easy'. So I sprinted to that line that would be the end of 'torture' and that made me real happy. I crossed it with a big smile on my face! "Baby was delivered and Mami happy.'
(My timing was much better than anticipated: 2 hours and 39 minutes.) and 2 seconds.)

It was hard and yet oh so worth it. Something that Beth anticipates with the birth of our child.Why am I even trying to compare the two? Well, for one, I can not do it myself - I mean the pregnancy and delivery - but I wanted to show my appreciation of what Beth is doing. Also, when she is in labor, she can not just stop and walk away, she has to finish it. Well, I wanted to treat my race the same way: I could not walk away or stop running, I had to finish it! It was worth every pain to be blessed with the encouragement of others and seeing Beth's face when she saw the sign at the finish line - it was priceless! This was for God's glory. He brought us together, brought us to this place, and has a plan for all of us! He deserves all my praise, especially today.


More pictures are right here - enjoy.

Ann right before crossing the finish line. (The time is the clock time, not MY chip time.)

Tired but happy.

My back.

Ann and Beth after the race, filled with drinks and food and happiness.

Added by the editor:

It felt more like a warm-up, but I thought this was way too funny not to share!