30 October 2009


Lately, alot of people that congratulated me to the birth of Peanut, also asked me how badly I am sleep-deprived? Well, I have to say.... not at all. I am a good sleeper, meaning that I sleep deep and resting. I don't need many hours of sleep at night, and do very well when I have a very short night. Also, my daughter has been sleeping through (!) the night since week six, so for the last three weeks. If she did wake up - which happened twice I believe - it was easy to put her back to sleep within seconds (or minutes!) WITHOUT feeding. Yeah....
So I am good. I do know that there are some envious people out there that think I just want to brag and make them feel bad about feeding their kids until 24 months.... I am not! It is as the bible says it: "God only 'burdens' us with stuff that we can handle." I am not so good at waking up in the middle of the night and feed someone and then have to rock them back to sleep or such.... I am not a morning person, I am a night person. So if Peanut would have decided to be a night-owl (which I secretly nicknamed her when she was born!), then I would be fine with that....
So if you are one of those night-feeders and that works for you, great. I am having a hard time with it. And God is good. This is what this post is about, giving thanks to God to ALWAYS providing us with what we need. I need good sleepers at night. I need my evening open for stuff I (!) like to do. But I am also willing to get up at 5 am to play with the kids (reminder: I am not a morning person! - but I'll do it!).
God is Good.

26 October 2009

Being blessed

Hey there - I am blessed!

I am blessed because I have a wonderful family. I am blessed because I have friends that care for me. My friend Beth (hi there!) threw me a baby shower / welcome home baby party. She did it all, from organizing everything, getting the invitations out, getting people to help her, and preparing all the yummy (mostly Vegan) food. She spent hours and hours on it - I was standing right next to her. She is so awesome and I love her very much. I feel special that someone would do this for me, so I have special moment celebrating my daughters birth - a long journey with a happy ending!

Thank you. I feel so blessed all over.....

18 October 2009

Feeling pregnant?

Today's post goes back in time.... the symptoms of being pregnant.

When we were "pregnant" with our blessing, things were sometimes not that easy, so it was hard for me to write it down here.... that's why there are so many 'empty' months.... And now that everything is over, it is easier to talk about it, in perspective.

So today, I want to talk about being pregnant, or feeling pregnant, or the lack of it. As I was not the one carrying our blessing, I did not have to deal with any symptoms. That can be a good thing, or a bad one. When I was carrying our first born, it was an easy pregnancy, no complications. No nausea. So I wouldn't have expected any this time around.... unfortunately, I didn't even get a chance to prove that theory. And I have to say that it was quiet hard to get ready for the baby if it is not there with you all the time. I mean the nesting. I did some preparation, of course, but my hormones didn't!!! So once you get that bundle of joy handed over, you are very happy.... but still the hormones are not there. For them, it's just another day....
So the transformation from being pregnant-on-the-sideline to mother-first-hand was much harder than expected.... My brain had to tell my hormones that we are suppose to be up every three hours at night to feed that beautiful baby. It was my brain that told my hormones and heart that this crying bundle of joy needs all my love..... Today, I can say, that every single organ and hormone and cell of my body has caught up with the brain. I am in love, totally in love with my beautiful daughter.....

She IS that blessing that we prayed for, for such a long time.

16 October 2009

Too much?

This is going to be a short posting.....
As you know, we just came back home, from New Jersey, where Peanut was born. Well, it took me over one whole day to pack the car for the road trip - and it took my husband over an hour to unpack the same car. Now it was my duty to unpack all the luggage we had. And yes, within two and a half month away from home, you need a few things and a couple of clothes. As Coqui is a growing boy, that is still somewhat potty-training, I tend to over-pack for him.....
In anticipation of Peanut's arrival, I packed a few things for him/her (we didn't know the sex of the baby!). That was about one box of Coqui's old baby clothes, some leftover diapers and such. Well, let me tell you - we came back with more stuff for Coqui - Mema buys! But that is almost nothing compared to what I had to bring home for Peanut.... I piled it all up in her closet on the floor. It is insane!!! She has more clothes than she'll be able to wear!And we still have about six boxes with clothes from Coqui.... I might have the best dressed girl in the neighborhood.....

So I want to be thankful for all the gifts we received in the past six weeks. It is such a blessing to us. Makes us feel all loved and warm around the heart.... THANK YOU. God is good and always a provider! He gives and gives and gives.....

15 October 2009

Breast milk

We came home on Tuesday. On Wednesday, I started to defrost some of that 'gold' we had in the fridge from a wonderful woman from our church.....
Yesterday, I was still mixing it with the formula, just to get Peanut used to the different taste. She didn't seem to mind any way. But today, she got her first bottle exclusively with breastmilk. She drank it all.... Whoo hoo....
God is so awesome to put people you need in our paths. It just totally blows my mind. We have been so blessed all this way..... and even if the path was not always smooth, it was totally worth it. Not just for having Peanut in our lives, but also just to experience the beauty of family and friends. I never met people like this before... people that just drop everything to do something for you, without that they get something out of it.....

GOD IS GOOD, no, no, let me rephrase that: GOD IS AWESOME. And only God can give us that peace and comfort and help and support and all the good stuff.
I love my Lord and I want to serve Him with all that I have..... Amen.

14 October 2009

Home Sweet Home

After being up north for two and a half months, we finally made our way back to the more beautiful weather. It has been an interesting drive,.... for three full days. On the first day, Peanut was all antsy and never went into that deep sleep. Coqui was doing great. We checked into a nice hotel, got the kids settled, and then.... they were asleep within minutes of each other. Nice!
The next morning, I woke up and realized that I didn't get up in the middle of the night for a feeding.... Peanut had slept through the night for the first time! Yeah.... (it was a whole month earlier than Coqui!). So the second day was the opposite from the first, Peanut was quieter and slept more during driving times, and Coqui became more and more whinny and wanted to get out of his seat.... I don't blame him, but we needed to keep going....
The second night's hotel was terrible, but we needed a place to sleep. Again, Peanut slept through seven hours without feeding, until 5 am - I count that as sleeping through the night, as this was Coqui's regular getting-up time when he was smaller!
The third day looked pretty much like the second day - but we made it home by 3 pm. Coqui ran upstairs and played and played and played..... Peanut was not so happy about not sitting in that car seat any more. She was quite cranky for the rest of the day, until we 'strapped' her into that swaddle and she found some rest for the night.
Yes, for the third consecutive night, Peanut slept through the night for 10 hours!!! Whoo hoo....

06 October 2009


I am still amazed at how different two kids with the same (?) gens can be.... Seriously!
While I do remember that Coqui was pretty colicky, he never screamed for no reason! Either he was hungry, wet, or in pain. And it only lasted for about 2 months. Since then, he has been the sunshine of my life, brightens each and every day, and when I feel down I just have to look at my happy silly boy to feel better!!!
Now having a girl (and heard some stuff said about girls), I am not that enthusiastic. I mean I love her, and pray that this is just the beginning, and she needs to find her way in life.... but she seems to scream for no reason. I just fed her, changed her diaper, and she still screams. And it is NOT that pain scream. She doesn't burp alot, she doesn't poop alot, she doesn't do anything LIKE Coqui... it is amazing, and a bit frustrating. She also doesn't want to sleep anywhere else BUT my bed, preferably in my arms, or right next to me with our cheeks touching! It is great bonding time, and I do hope that she'll be a bigger hugger and cuddler than Coqui was and is.

I do like that they are different, it is just harder to adjust. I love them both. And I guess it is kind of cool to have a boy and a girl, so as a mom, you do it all! We never stop learning, right?

01 October 2009


I am a very natural person, green through and through.... So wanting to breastfeed my babies is normal. I was very determined to breastfeed my firstborn - but somehow, he was very reluctant with the whole latching-on.... so it never happened. Still I knew that breast milk is the best he could get, so I pumped the milk for him and gave it to him with the bottle. I pumped for nine months, pumped more than he ate a day, so froze the rest, so I could give him breast milk for ten entire months. It was hard at times, but definitely worth it. I know I tried and succeeded.

So of course, I wanted to do so for my second child, that was on the way in the womb of our carrier. There was some talk about her pumping for a little after birth, but I couldn't count on that. So I researched a little and some more.... there is a drug out there, but it is not FDA approved. So I tried to confirm with my oncologist, but she never got back to me. Talking to my husband, we kind of made the decision that it might not be for me. When I told my doctor, she seemed relieved. So I think this time around, it was better not to take the drug....

But it still left me with only one choice: the 'hated' formula. To me, it stinks, it stains, it is so unnatural. But I have no choice, my baby girl NEEDS to eat.
Well, there were a lot of women pregnant around the same time as we were.... and just another provision from God reveals itself in front of me: one of those lovely ladies offered to pump some milk for me, so I can give it to Peanut! Wow, that just blows me away, makes me feel so loved and so blessed! So now, when I get back home, there is a freezer full of 'gold' waiting for us to take home and thaw and give it to her. The best nutrition out there for babies. The gold that makes her grow healthy and strong!

God, thank you for providing for us always. I am so grateful for my friends and family. I am in total awe of what some of them sacrifice for the benefit of others. You blow me away.

Hungry hippo

"How much is too much?"

It is so true when people say" every child is different. Not that I didn't know that before, but seeing it now happening in front of my eyes with my two children - it is different.
First, one is definitely more relaxed with every additional child. At least, I am more relaxed and at ease, less worry and less trying to do it right - because there is no 'textbook-right'. Every mother (and father) will find their own way of doing things.
For example, with Coqui, I was, as the pediatrician told you to do, wrote down every diaper change, pee-pee and poos, every ounce of milk intake, and every other thing one could jot down....
This time: I don't do any of this. Unfortunately, I am not home, because there is one thing that I am curious about and can't remember: how much did Coqui eat??? Because my little darling girl here, she is eating ALL the time. Every two hours during the day, and every 3-4 hours at night (which is great). She is growing and getting stronger, holding her head and such.... but that eating pattern - it is a big change for me.
But all said and done, she is so beautiful and we rejoice in having her with us. All we wanted this long way along, that she'll be healthy! And I guess part of being healthy, is eating to get big and strong! So bon appetit, little Peanut!